Monday

What's a Liger?


Dy-no-Mite!!!
Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.

So,

Very quiet weekend. Re-connected with some old friends on Friday... went to a party down the hall with the roomie on Saturday. It was lame.

Actually, let me rephrase that. I was probably NOT lame. The bloke down the hall who has these parties every other night it seems, has some pretty darn good parties. The only thing about said parties is that they typically don't come into their own until like 1am. Which is good if you are an artiste who can party until all hours of the morning, but us regular folk... "Let's get this party started before midnight" is more our kind of song.

So we bade our time until 10:30 or so before we went over. And it was as I suspected-- just a few people hanging out, waiting for more people to arrive. And what a group of people it was. Rod/Todd was there, and how! He was wearing a saucy little number which included a multi-coloured striped oxford shirt, with non-matching strip-ed pants... and a tie. It seemed bizarre. That is, it seemed bizarre until he apologized for not having come to finish the construction in our loft as he had promised months ago when he was trying to get into the roomies pants...

"I'm really sorry I haven't come over to finish your place, but I've been kind of strung out for the past month. Can I get your guys' phone number?"

OK, Rod, that explains your "Amazing Technicolour Outfit". But at least he had a friend at the party. It's true, Napolean Dynamite was there and just as strung out as Rod. The two of them were free dancing like there was no tomorrow. I hadn't the heart to tell them that it wasn't that kind of a party. Anyway, I didn't stay for long. Apparently, planks of wood are not condusive to partying and/or being sociable.

Being around a mini-Napolean Dynamite did cause me to further reflect on something that I have been thinking about of late though... Let me enlighten...

I saw Napolean Dynamite the movie a while back. I rented it with the PNB and couldn't have been more excited to see it. And then we watched it. There were a few chuckles, but it wasn't the laugh o' minute movie that I had expected it to be. Both the PNB and I were in agreement that it kind of, totally sucked. When I found out that the roomie also severely disliked the movie and I felt much better that I wasn't the only one who was disappointed.

And then it started happening. In social situations, the subject of this film would come up and without fail, it would turn out that the other party(ies) was/were of the opinion that it was the funniest movie ever made. I thought they might have all been mildy retarded but, to each their own and I had no problems with it until...

I started to go out on dates and this subject came up quite frequently. In short, every single guy I went out with was a huge Napolean Dynamite fan... and the looks I got when I said that I wasn't? Well, you would have thought that I had just told them that I clubbed little baby seals as a hobby.

"What do you mean you hated Napolean Dynomite? How could you NOT have thought it was the funniest movie ever? Ugh, I'm just disgusted."

I kid you not. One guy even thought he was Napolean Dynomite. Lots of beer made THAT funny, but I am sure it would have gotten old if I had had to endure it for a long and/or sober period of time. I never did hear back from these fellas.

So, my observation is thus: The world is divided into two camps-- those who LOVE Napolean Dynamite and those who do not. My past experience has led me to believe that these two ideologies are incompatible.

I have spent weeks and weeks analyzing why, that despite having had a great time, these gents didn't want to get together again.


My conclusion? I am now firmly convinced that Napolean Dynamite is 100% to blame for all of this misfortunte. AND, I might even go so far as to say that my sudden and tragic loss of mojo is a direct result of the above mentioned movie and any lack of enthusiasm for it. There is NO OTHER possible explanation.

And what of the solution? You'll be happy to now that I will be forming a support group for people like the roomie and me... the PNB too, if he finds that he has been adversely affected by this phenomenon. We meet under the next full moon. Wear only galoshes and a newspaper hat. Together we will beat this thing down.

Bea Out!

13 comments:

Wee said...

Oh boy - Napolean Dynamite has sure been a prominent topic of discussion around my little circle of friends as of late. After all of the great reviews (ie. best movie ever, etc) we decided to have a little movie night and rent ND. We laughed (a little) but as you said weren't totally blown away by it. My friends all agreed that they were a bit disappointed and that it wasn't "that funny". But then something happened... we started referencing the movie ALL THE TIME... we started saying things like "Dang" and "I'll do whatever I want to do - GOD" (insert ND accent here) and holy S&*t - if it isn't the funniest thing we've ever heard in our lives. I must say, we've had much more enjoyment remembering Napolean Dynamite then we got our of actually watching the flick. Go ahead, do the voice... make your colleagues laugh. That is the Napolean Dynamite secret.

mollyblogger said...

I've embraced it as a unique-ness. Hating the movie makes me different from most people and different is okay... in fact, it's even good.

The worst ND experience I had was in a cocktail lounge in Oakville (a fancy-pants rich town just outside of Toronto) where they were playing it on a big screen. It was impossible not to see it.

I agree though, it seems to be everywhere. Remember when we went out with the artist down the hall and the other girl he was sleeping with and she said she loved that movie and I completely shunned her? I didn't mean to, but I was genuinely appalled that she thought that was the best movie that had ever been made.

Who are these people?

Beatrice Petty said...

Wee: Totally agree on the impersonations apres the movie. Way funnier than the movie itself. FEG was a mini-ND and it was frigging hilarious.

Truth be told, I think the movie itself was a baker... and I was, um, without certain ingredients when I watched. Perhaps if I watched it again under different circumstances... I'd give it another chance.

Molly: You didn't so much as "shun" her as you made her feel like the biggest IDIOT who ever walked no this planet. Good Times.

ps. Not that she needed any help feeling like the biggest idiot because I think that she probably is. Didn't you give her your number so you could hang out? I'm telling you, t'ain't gonna work out until you go over to the dark side... the ND loving dark side that is.

ULH / former PNB said...

For some reason, ND does not come up in any of my conversations. I do not know if you can equate it to Girls discussing Arts & Culture while Guys tend to base their talks around Sports and Boobies. For me, the only time I talk about old films is when I recommend one that I liked (like Shaving Ryan's Privates, etc). I am however, wondering why I am the only guy you have talked with that wasn't blown away by ND (I think it is just "cool" for guys to say they liked ND...even though they didn't OR didn't even see it in the first place).

Capitaine said...

Now I really feel the impact of moving to a small French town... I've never heard of Napoleon Dynamite!!!

Beatrice Petty said...

LOL...

Capitaine: Naploean Dynamite is a movie that we would have gone to Slivercity to watch, but not before we made our usual pitstop by the stream... wink, wink.

ULH: And WHERE pray tell was this "Shaving Ryan's Privates" when I was around??? That would have been oh so much fun!

PS. Girls rarely talk about Arts and Culture. In case you didn't notice from this blog, we mostly talk about boys. Oh, and boobies now and again.

LuckySpinster said...

You are correct, the world IS composed entirely of two camps, those who LOVE Napoleon Dynamite, and you & the roomie.

GOD.

Cascadia said...

I need to add a third camp - those of us who haven't seen the movie but feel like we have because it is contsnatly being referenced. I must admit, it makes the whole dating thing easier. "Oh, I haven't gotten around to seeing that yet"! Works wonders on the boys. Okay, works wonders on the 4 boys I have chatted with in the last 6 months!

theGuywiththeHat said...

I think it has to be a big group experience and the group should be very immature and/or inebriated. Am I declaring my vast number of years when I say I saw the Rocky Horror Picture show on prom night? Lots of people did and still do hate that movie but, I think it was one of the greatest movie watching experiences ever (not a good movie though).

Now, I didn't like ND. I got bored watching it. The group I was with was watching it for like the 20th time. They couldn't believe that I wasn't totally into it. I think they even felt sorry for me :) I love the quotes and impersonations though. They are IMO much better than the movie. Which makes me tend to gravitate toward people who loved it. Weird huh?

I know. You can use the ND issue to screen PNB's: and acid test (AT). Whether or not they like ND might actually be a good compatibility indicator. You should put that question on the PNB application.

mollyblogger said...

Guy With the Hat: good call on the ND AT for PNBs. I think I'll use it myself.

Beatrice Petty said...

GREAT!!!

As if I wasn't having a difficult ENOUGH time meeting PNBs, now I have to eliminate like 3/4s (at least) of all eligible men out there, just by this criteria alone...

It's official. I am going to die a spinster, surrounded by cats and balloon animals.

LuckySpinster said...

GOD.

and what's wrong with dying a spinster, eh? ;)

theGuywiththeHat said...

OK, you don't have to completely eliminate the Dyno-heads. You could put their applications in the Potential New Fling pile. PNF's are like extremely disposable PNB's. They are like drinks and appetizers that keep you occupied until the main course arrives.