Catch Me if You Can

So, Bea Downunda finally got a chance to read the lovely advice some of you put towards her situation. I don't think it was exactly what she wanted to hear, but hey, it was honest and spoken from the heart and that's what counts. Here's wising her luck with the whole thing.

But she did bring up something interesting (as did the Lucky Spinster). Why is it always the guys who we are not interested in who pay us the most attention? And why do the guys we are actually interested in, seem to not want to have anything to do with us at all? Throw in Molly's little dilema and you have a regular little predicament.

A guy I went out with a few months back had just such a term for it. He called it Sod's Law, which basically means "whatever you do, you are going to be f*cked up the arse". I like Sod's Law. It's much more graphic than Murphy's Law and more colourful than "you're damned if you do etc..."

Is it that the boys we are not interested in can sense it, and are therefore spurred on by the chase? And do the guys who we show interest in not show us interest in return because there is no chase? Does this all stem from the days of the caveman when the urge to "hunt" was not done for simply for sport but for the very survival of the clan? Now that the hunt and chase have turned into the weekly grocery shop at Safeway, are men now directing this primal hunting urge towards us instead of the Woolly Mammoth and Sabre-tooth Tiger?

I'm just not interested unless I have to get up off my ass and chase after it.

I suppose it's better than "Where's the remote? Oh, it's over there by the TV and here I am all the way over here on the couch. I guess the channel stays on this infommercial about female incontinence".

So, the chase eh? I suppose I would be happy to oblige. I really should work on getting back into shape if I don't want to be so easily caught. Except... I was never very good at running... have they decided to allow those little Segway scooter thingies on the sidewalks yet? That's much more my style!

You, on the sidewalk... Look Out!!!



Jay said...

Well now you've put a name to years of hostility, good for you.

mollyblogger said...

Yeah, I think of Sod's Law all the time. It's very predominant in my life. And really, if you're going to get f*cked, you should be ready for it.

theGuywiththeHat said...

Weren't there a lot of episodes in a lot of old TV shows where one girl says something to her friend like "Oh my GAWD! You NEVER accept the first date! Tell him you'd love to but you're busy that night, no matter what!"?

Or what about the advice I got "Always get her number. Never give her yours. And, NEVER call her the day after you get the digits. You have to wait at least 48 hours."?

Then there's lines like "You have beautiful hair. But, it would go better with the shape of your face if you grew it out/cut it shorter." (which ever way she doesn't wear her hair)

Or a girl telling a guy "You have a really nice body. But, <grinning> you have no ass what so ever." (especially effective if she thinks he does have a nice ass)

Why are all of us susceptible to stuff like that?

Cascadia said...

I have given up on these "rules", I am not very good at them, which could explain my lack of luck in the whole dating relationship thingy. I think everyone in the world should take the "vow". I vow to tell you the truth when it comes to how I feel. And if I don't know, I will tell you that too. I promise not to waste your time, and jerk you around, not matter how hard it is. Do you think it would work? No, probably not. Get out your clubs boys, us girls, we are tricky to catch.

LuckySpinster said...

sod's law. yeah. without the benefit of a reach-around. i'm just tired of it all. i don't even know if i can get excited about another guy ever again in my entire life as long as i live. isn't insanity what they call doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results? i figure i'm just not going to care as much or invest and if something sticks, well, that's great, but i'm not going to sweat anything.

boy, i am way more cynical than i realized.

Anonymous said...

Have you seen the Dao of Steve? if not you can rent it...great film that gets right to the heart of what your discussing

my new favorite pick-up line:
Nice shoes, wanna f*ck?

and by the way I did learn alot about female incontenance during those four hours the remote was so dastardly out of reach.

Beatrice Petty said...

Jay: Thanks for the props... you wanna know what I picture "Sod" to look like? An evil pickle.

Molly: There is a fine line between expecting to be f*cked up the arse at all times, and being a chronic pessimist... what to do... what to do.

GH: Those are some harsh lines. I think the worst one I ever got was "Don't flatter yourself". I was horribly offended by it at the time.

Cass: I totally agree. Playing hard to get sounds an awful lot like playing games... especially if you are like me and it doesn't come naturally. I was really hoping that games were not necessary after you turned 30 but sadly, that does no appear to be the case. Be true to thine self... my new mantra.

LS: Practically every female in my acquaintance has your same attitude re: guys right now. I've been in the "why bother" place for some time now. But as Molly told me on the way to work this morning... when all else fails, there is always hope. Where is Obi Wan when you need him!

Anonymous: Hey, whoever you are. I do plan on buying some new shoes over the weekend so I can look fab at my Holt Renfrew gig next week. I SO hope someone uses that line on me... I can't think of anything more romantic. Re: female incontinence infommercials for 4 hours. Yikes.

theGuywiththeHat said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
theGuywiththeHat said...

Yes Bea, those lines are harsh. They are definitely NOT relationship starters. They play on insecurities. To what end? Adding someone to the PBC list (possible booty call) by making them "work for it".

I'm rather apathetic about dating and romantic relationships. It's much more fun and a lot less stress to do the friends thing. So, I totally agreed with LS's comment. Does that make me a cynic too? Or, are we both smarter than the average bear?

My friend and pseudo little sis created a group titled "Emotionally Unavailable" on one of the social nets. I was one of the first people she invited to join and, I thought "Yeah, that's me." Yikes! Which should scare me more, that my friends see me that way or that I agree?