Happy Thoughts :)

Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
Well Hello there All!

So begins another week in the Big Smoke and despite last night's late bedtime and my little monster cat keeping me up most of the night, I feel pretty darn good today. I am over the unexpectedly disappointing turn that my weekend took and I am SO ready to move on.

Actually, back up a moment! There is still something from the weekend that I will NOT get over as easily, and that was the train wreck that was The Oscars last night. I am HORRIFIED that Million Dollar Baby won Best Picture. Horrified! And whoever was in charge of the lighting last night? Let's just say that I don't think that he/she/they should be allowed to do their jobs unsupervised EVER again. I'm thinking that something a little softer than 1 trillion watt halogen might have been in order. Don't even get me started on Beyonce! At least Orlando was there. He's so dreamy, my little metrosexual fantasy.

And how did the old girl do with her Oscar predictions? Not so well, I am afraid. Out of the 17 categories that I made a stab at, I got 8 right. I would have had had more, but, um, please refer to my above-mentioned horror at the victory of MDB. That is the all I have to say on the matter.

So, what's next for Sweet Bea, I can here you all asking. Er... I dunno but I am making the steps towards figuring that out. Actually something did come up this weekend which was really very helpful. Without going into all the details, a tool that I have recently been using to help me along my emotional awakening kind of came out of nowhere and bitch slapped me right across the face with some advice. Although I knew it all along, I was made to step back and re-evaluate the face that I have been showing to others of late. What I found/ re-affirmed was that it has been decidedly negative. Yes, I've had my feelings somewhat trampled on a bit over the past couple of months, but SO WHAT? It has all been my own doing, right? I put myself out there; I made my own decisions. Regardless of how things turned out, I have become a better person because of the experiences. Anyway, blah, blah, blah...

I know, not the juicy stuff you are used to, but there you have it. You have Bea's solemn vow that she is going to put on a much happier face from now on, and not just superficially.... It's not like I am going to walk around with a Cheshire Cat grin on my face or anything... that would be very frightening actually... my intention here is not to actually scare people away... would that be a step up from a negative face??? Interesting...I digress. What I mean is that from now on, I will be attempting to "stop the insanity" if you will, and break free from the blahs and subconscious negative thoughts that have taken over lately, so that everyone I come into contact with will know just how beautiful, warm and amazing Beatrice Petty is inside. Warm and fuzzy enough for you?

Bye from Beatrice


Dear Mr (s). Anonymous (es)

Hi folks. You may or may not have deduced that the Mr. Anonymous from a while back was none other than the former-PNB himself. But don't worry, I so completely offended him with my honesty and forthrightedness, that the odds that he is actually still reading my blog are slimmer than this guy I saw at the AGO yesterday... It's true, I couldn't look away. He turned and were it not for the fact that he had the great mound of long bushy hair (which I think he keeps to add some weight to his body so he doesn't get blown away in the wind), he would have damned near disappeared. What I am trying to say is that, more so after this weekend than ever before, Bea is in dire need of advice, preferably from the male point of view, as my confusion vis a vis that gender has increased exponentially. Hence why I have the addressed to ALL the Mr. Anonymous's out there... This plea for help goes out to any and all men out there. Here goes:


Dear Mr. Anonymous,

Once again, the Universe decided to remind Bea that happiness in love was just not in the cards for her right now. Don't get me wrong, I'm not sad, or bitter, or any other decidedly negative emotion right now, but I am frustrated. So VERY frustrated. I really and truly just DO NOT understand where men are coming from, I really don't.

A little background might be in order. Furtherto yesterday's posting regarding Garrett, it is now certain that it was not just the cold that was dampening his enthusiasm. It's true, I received the "I think you are super cool and I really, really like you but..." (actual words) email last night. I have to say that I was more than a little shocked. After all, this was the guy who had spent most of last week sending me horoscopes and other such emails and calls convincing me how MFEO we were. It freaked me out a little bit actually. But hey, he seemed cool, so I thought I would give it a shot. And so give it a shot I did, and I played it cool. I totally let him lead the way, only allowing myself to pick up on what he was putting out there. Despite my best intentions of not getting my hopes up or having any expectations, Garrett practically had us moving in together next week. What was a girl to do? Exit Garrett, stage left.

And what of Tim? At this point I really don't care. A terrible attitude, I know, but it's about all I am capable of right now.

So, Mr. Anonymous('s), I guess this is what I need to know is... What's the deal? Seriously. What am I doing wrong? Playing the "I'm really interested" card hasn't worked for me but neither have "I'm as cool as a cucumber" or "Let's see where this goes as friends". I'm running out of ideas here and am starting to take things personally. I've never thought myself to be completely unfortunate in the looks department, nor have I thought I was lacking in personality either. What is it that guys are looking for that I just don't have? Don't get me wrong, I have no regrets nor am I pining over the "what might have beens" from the last few months... It's just an honest to goodness complete lack of a clue about what goes on in the brains of men. Any and all advice/comments will be much appreciated.

Beatrice (so clueless) Petty

OK, so that's over and done with. Tonight is the Oscars. I trust you will all be watching. I am looking forward to another week and am hopeful that the Universe might throw something good out at me. And if it doesn't? I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.



A Series of Unfortunate Events

Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
In a nutshell, that describes the past couple of days in Bea's life.

So Friday... The big date with Tim. Sigh. Tim was tired. So tired that the evening was over before it had even started. It was all he could do to prop his head up on the table in his hand and participate in the conversation. My big night of "perhaps I won't even make it home at all" ended up with me being home by 8:30pm. So very disappointing. But at least I had Saturday with Garrett right?

Like, What-ever!!!

The day started off OK. Got the confirmation call...

Still up for the AGO??? Yep??? Good... meet you there at 2.

It all went downhill from that point on. Granted, Garrett is very sick. He was even sick on Thursday. He looked like crap, sounded like crap, and smelled like a Halls factory had just exploded... However, I wasn't feeling the love. How unfortunate.

At any rate, I'm not going to hold it against Garrett, but I am leaving the ball in his court. Same thing goes for Tim. Here's where I put all the wonderful education I gleaned from "He's Just Not Into You" and put it into practice.

Wish me luck everyone!



A moment of silence please

While I mourn the loss of something that had become near and dear to me these past few months. It's offical, the Pumpkin Spice Latte is no more. At least until next Thanksgiving at any rate. You bet I'm counting the days.

On a happier note, I had a great time with one of my possible new suitors. With promises to myself that I would be home no later than 10, I found myself at the Dundas West station at 1am, waiting for the good old 168 to take me home to beddie bye. Am I tired today? Yes. Am I surprised that I had a good time? Yes, actually. Of the two new men in my life, both of whom I have been in constant contact with over this past week, I had to admit to myself that I was less excited about my date with Garret than I was with my date tonight with Tim. It's possible that it had something to do with something the roomie said in response to a question I asked a couple of days ago:

Bea says "So, I don't really remember what Garrett looked like, but I seem to rememember that he wasn't completely unfortunate."

Molly, pausing to think "No, I don't think he was completely unfortunate."

OK then... anyway, there were some other things too. I find Tim much easier to talk to than Garrett. Garrett seems to have some trouble opening up to people, but given the job he's had over the last decade and a half-- Disaster and Catastrophe Coordinator-- it makes sense that he's had to compartmentalize his feelings. Like I said, we had a great time and are still on for the AGO and dinner tomorrow. Oh, and a final note on the evening: No full on make out session, but we had a couple of goodbye kisses. There was a very nice spark if I may say so, a very nice spark indeed. Sigh.

So here we are. It's Friday. I'm tired. And I'm off in a bit to meet up with Tim. I'm a little more nervous to meet Tim. Why? I don't know, but he's planned a great evening. I like that quality in a man... a take charge kind of guy. It's a nice change from "I dunno, where do you want to go?" I DON'T KNOW!!! DON'T ASK ME, I JUST MOVED TO THE CITY FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! Anyway, we'll see how it all goes. I'd like to say that I'll be home by 10, but I would only be kidding myself. It's Friday and drinks will be flowing; it's entirely possible that I might not even make it home at all. wink.

Petty Out


The Oscar Edition

Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
As promised and much anticipated I am sure, here are the old girl's Oscar predictions. I make no guarantees as to the accuracy of what is to follow. If you're a bettin' fellow and you lose the house... Don't come crying to Bea. These predications are for entertainment purposes ONLY. Now that we're done with the legalities, let's get this party started.


Don Cheadle - HOTEL RWANDA
Leonardo DiCaprio - THE AVIATOR
Jamie Foxx - RAY

This one is a tough one. I LOVED Jamie Fox in Ray and I predict that he will win. He can't not win really. However, if truth be told, I would like the award to go to Leo. The Aviator was a better film than Ray and Leo did an AMAZING job. If it weren't for Jamie, he would be a shoe in.


Thomas Haden Church - SIDEWAYS
Clive Owen - CLOSER

If the title of this award was "Supporting Actor That Bea Would Most Like To Have End Up In Her Bed"... Clive Owen. Ah, heck, he won the Golden Globe too... I'm sticking with Clive.


Annette Bening - BEING JULIA
Catalina Sandino Moreno - MARIA FULL OF GRACE
Imelda Staunton - VERA DRAKE

Want: Kate Winslet. Think will win: Hilary Swank. Totally sucks!


Cate Blanchett - THE AVIATOR
Laura Linney - KINSEY
Virginia Madsen - SIDEWAYS
Sophie Okonedo - HOTEL RWANDA
Natalie Portman - CLOSER

Cate Blanchett or Virginia Madsen... can't be more specific than that. Sorry.



Only saw Shrek 2. Heard that Shark Tale sucked. I'm going with The Incredibles.



I find myself frustrated with this category because I never got to see 2 of the movies that I really wanted to. Sigh... I suppose I'll have to go with The Aviator, albeit reluctantly.



Once again, The Aviator. No real reason. Sorry, not much enthusiasm for this category either.



The Aviator. I'm a huge fan of the era this movie was set in. The costumes were great. Lemony Snicket or Troy might sneak in though. Then again, anyone could piece together a bit of fabric to serve as Brad Pitt's loincloth... I wish I was that loincloth...



Hmmm. Clint Eastwood won the GG for this, but he may have split the vote being nominated for leading actor. I'm rooting for The Aviator's Marty Scorsese. Short people need love too.



Super Size Me... Fantastic. But only because the Documentary on Stupidity was not nominated. They kind of are realted though... I vote for both! ps... I still eat at McDee's from time to time... so ashamed.



Do I give 2 hoots about this category? No, but Hardwood is done by a Canadian... so, Hardwood... fingers crossed.



Harry Potter, always Harry Potter!


"Accidentally In Love" - SHREK 2
"Look To Your Path (Vois Sur Ton Chemin)" - THE CHORUS

Accidentally in Love... so darn catchy. And now it's stuck in my head... Thanks Counting Crows!



Another confusing category for Bea. I didn't find anything particularily outstanding with the effects for HP. On the other hand, I hated I, Robot and Spider-Man 2... Hmmm... Harry Potter. Wait, can I vote for Lord of the Rings?



Although I NEVER want to EVER see Million Dollar Baby... I'm going to go ahead and put my full backing behind Paul Haggis' adapted screenplay for said movie. Why? I met Paul Haggis. He was really nice and, he's Canadian. Look for him in the near future... His film Crash was very highly regarded at the TIFF. Go Paul Go!!!



The Aviator was very good however, I am going to go out on a limb and predict that Charlie Kauffman is going to take it home for Eternal Sunshine. It's got to win something folks!!!

And last, but not least:



The Aviator. Granted I never saw MDB or Sideways so of course, there is the ever so slight possibility that I might be wrong... But I don't think so. And you can take THAT to the bank and cash it.

So, there you have my predictions, for what they are worth. I suppose now I am stuck with those choices so I had better be happy with them Too late now I guess, but I would love to hear what other people think.

I had a pretty good track record last year, but I have LOTR to thank for that. Is it just me, or were the movies that came out last year kind of crappy? I had to force myself to go and see some of them just so I could write as accurate and informed predictions for you people as possible. See what lengths I go to to keep you all amused? So unappreciated!

Bea Out


Social Calendar Now Full: Please Take a Number

Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
Continuing on from yesterday's posting, it would seem that my life has once again done a 180.

The past few weeks featured a lot of down time and lots of time to self-reflect... which was great, don't get me wrong. It was also mildly boring, hence why I was jonesing for the Lava Crack once again.

And from the "Be careful what you wish for" files comes what has now become my week. Let me enlighten you if I may.

So, I tried to follow my own advice and told these new suitors (NS) that I really wasn't into the writing back and forth for weeks on end... yaddayaddayadda... and to give me a call. Both NSs were man enough to do this. In fact, one NS was man enough to come to my party this weekend, the other to phone me long distance from Vancouver. Unfortunately, being under stimulated at work got the better of me and I've spent the past couple of days in constant communication with the both of them... They are both equally communictaive with me. It's been great, I'm getting to know them... But UH OH... the bi-product of doing this has had the end result of my expectations being slightly higher than I had wanted. Oh well... I can't help it if one can't stop calling me cutie, and the other one can't stop saying how much he can't wait to meet me. It's not MY fault that I am so damned irresistable!!!

So that's that. Thursday has dinner with Garret... the first NS in the picture. It'll be a lovely affair with the roomie joining us... as she can no longer bare being alone in the company of her former csbf-now stalker who lives down the hall. Good Times.

And Friday? That's Tim... He wanted to take me to the 360 Restaurant. It was all I could do to not pee my pants in laughter. Anyway, I talked him out of that because that is WAY too fancy for Bea on a first date... Perhaps the second... no wait, that's already been decided... hold please.

And on to Saturday... the AGO and Dinner with Garrett again...

And finally, we make it to Sunday, with Tim coming over to our 1st Annual Oscar Night Shindig. Dee and I are cooking a roast. On the wine list we shall feature a nice red, perhaps a cabernet shiraz? Details to follow.

And so like good old Georgie, I am confused. I like them both equally, but they are both so different. One is 38 and has a wicked job where he gets to travel the world, while the other is 29 and has lots of tattoos. Apples and Oranges folks... Apples and Oranges!!!

Anyhoo, I'm not sure about you guys, but even looking at my week is starting to exhaust me. I may need to take Monday off just to recuperate. Of course the postings are likely to get a tad juicier after Thursday so stay tuned. In the meantime Oscar predictions will be forthcoming shortly.

Who loves yooz guyz?


An amazing tribute to a creative man.

Hunter S. Thompson

The Universe is Funny Sometimes

It's been a crazy last couple of days folks. I am not going to lie to you.

Saturday was the big B-Day/Housewarming party at the loft. It was quite the party; I was there for most of it. My body checked out a little bit earlier than I would have hoped. But no matter, it was rocking nonetheless. I had invited a boy over and it was going to be our first date, of sorts. It was a beautiful plan, really. What better a place to meet a new friend? Not many, let me tell you!

Alas, as many things in Bea's life... things didn't turn out according to plan. As already stated, I checked out rather early and didn't really get a chance to chat as much as I would have have liked to the above mentioned boy. No matter though, as all is well.

And just when you think life is not going to throw you any more lemons... I am also kind of smitten with a new person. Two guys at the same time?!? YIKES!!!

Wait a minute. Before you think I am some kind of crazy serial dater... let me tell you I am now off the lava crack for the time being. The whole thing was quite accidental I can assure you. I think two very nice gents are more than enough for me right now. I guess more to tell on that front will come in the near future so check back for updates.

On a completely different note... The Oscars are this Sunday so stay tuned for Be Petty's 2nd Annual Oscar Predictions. Always a crowd pleaser.

Ciao Bella,
Beatrice Petty


Just a few things...

oreo's new hobby
Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
What can I say about this picture except that my cat is crazy! She'll stay in this position for several minutes, just staring at the front door... pondering life in general. Ah, the life of a cat.

So, as the title of this posting would suggest, just a few things. I begin the with the sad news that today I had finally drummed up the courage to ask My Mailman what his relationship status was... and then see where things led from there. Unfortuntately, a colleague of mine chose that time to come to my desk to start a conversation on the ethics of keeping animals in zoos. There will be no Mailman at the party this Saturday... how sad.

While we are on the topic of zoos and wild animals... I would like to take this opportunity to announce that I have, once again, put myself in the path of the oncoming train that is Lavalife. I know, I know... I really don't want to do it... My head is hung slightly in shame. It didn't really work out for me the last time I was on, but I figured that there was no point letting all the recent insight I've gained to go to waste. So, with that in mind, I am going into the whole affair with a new attitude and every intention of following the advice that I so diligently laid out for my friend Cascadia. Also, I'm REALLY bored.

So far there hasn't been a whole lot of action on that front. I don't remember the pickings being so slim the last time around. So far, the most appealing people my searches have unearthed are dudes who I have already gone out with. In the silly mood I was in last night, I was tempted to send a smile to the former PNB as a joke. However, he's been a grumpy bugger lately so I figured the humour would go unappreciated. It was probably for the best anyway... I should not use Lavalife for my own entertainment purposes!!! Wait a minute... I ABSOLUTELY should use Lavalife in that manner. People take themselves way too seriously on that thing. Get over yourselves people!!! Oh, and I also feel compelled to out the roomie... who has gone back on the crack that is Lava as well. Let the adventures begin!



Bea Swallows her Pride

Hi. Still reeling from the fact that there are actually people reading this little project O'Mine, I feel compelled to address a comment that was made on a posting a few days ago.

Dear Mr. Anonymous,

Thank you for your comments. It is always great to have a male perspective thrown into the mix. I do realize that this blog does tend to be very femalecentric. But hey, I am a girl, so that is not going to change anytime soon.

First off, let me say that you are 100% correct... told you that there would be some pride swallowing going on. My intention was never to come across as "the victim", because I really don't feel that way with the way things turned out. When writing of such things in the future I will choose my words a little better. The "accountability greatly helping in the success of a relationship" comment has me more confused though. Am I to be held accountable because someone decided on his own that he no longer wished to see if the relationship could be successful? I don't remember having had any say in the matter. But then again, Bea's short-term memory isn't what it used to be.

Re: Checking Lava mail vs. actually going on dates. Once again Mr. Anonymous, you are absolutely correct. I feel bad that it happened and I know mentionning that the "dates" were not dates per say but were "meeting up with potential people to hang out with in the city who knew BEFORE I met up with them that I wasn't interested in dating"... deep breath... in no way excuses that behaviour. Had I known that a certain someone wasn't checking his Lava every day so he could meet and go out with other people... perhaps I might have done things differently. Unfortunately, I assumed that the only possible explanation for someone doing this was because they WERE actively seeking other people to meet and date. And you know what they say when you assume something... That's right, I mad asses of us both. My mistake and I have received my comeupance in a big way.

And further to point #6 (and all the points actually) in the blog of contention... It was not my intention to crucify or even criticize the actions anyone in particular. Well, maybe the gangbang hot tub dude because he was a prick (his name is Mike fyi)... Anyway, as per a discussion that was had a while back, the checking of the Lavalife was never really a big deal to me... Honestly. Of course I didn't know for sure, but I suspected that the PNB wasn't seeing anyone else. And I didn't press him to go off, because I thought I was being a casual, cool, collected, patient (and dead sexy) PNG... not wanting to cut off something I saw to be a symbolic link to his old bachelor self. I realize that I did not articulate this in the entry, so Cascadia if you are reading... Only you know what your heart can and cannot handle. I was lucky enough to have met someone whom I trusted implicitely, who always came through when he said he would, and always treated me with great respect.

And so, Mr. Anonymous... if you are reading, thank you once again for your thoughts. I would just like to mention here that while things didn't work out as one had once hoped they would... I had a great time in the adventure nonetheless. I felt so contented and comfortable when we were together, and still do on a somewhat different level. You always made me feel very special and I thank you for that.

Beatrice "a little more humble" Petty

Happy Birthday Beatrice

fellow aquarius
Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
Yes, the big day has arrived and with it, oodles of enlightenment. The first being that Levar Burton is perhaps the most famous person to share the same birthday as me. That is indeed very exciting. I mean that. I really like Star Trek: TNG. Seriously.

I'm also feeling much better today thanks for asking. I'm sure that my sinus infection breaking at 4am last night is a big reason for that... My head feels much clearer today than it has in a week or so. Yay! It's possible that the blahs were also, in part, caused by the above mentionned chronic infirmity that has plagued me for years... Stupid sinuses... always acting up at the most inconvenient times.

Anyway, back to the B-Day enlightenments... OK, so we had Geordi... Actually, that's about it right now... I've been so darn grumpy of late that I really didn't want to think a whole lot about ANYTHING for fear of bringing any sort of negativity into my life. I suppose that is a sort of revelation in and of itself... quarantine myself accordingly-- both physically and emotionally-- when I'm not at my best, hormones raging etc...

Speaking of raging, for those who live in the GTA, don't forget about the Party in Super Loft this Saturday. Come one, come all. If you ask nicely, we might even clean the cat poop of the patio. How's that for enticing?

Oh, and BYOB+B. The extra B is for Boys... That's right, you heard me... Bea needs some lovin'... and how!

That is all,


Worst Mood Ever!!!

angry homer
Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
What can I say except that it would seem that last weeks' numbness, coupled with the blahs I have been feeling these past few days have culminated in me being in one of the worst moods I have been in in a very, very long time. In keeping with yesterdays' posting which featured some very useful formulas, I have decided to present you with the short version of the reasons behind my melancholy:

Upcoming Birthday x upcoming birthday x upcoming birthday x (V-Day + general feeling of lonliness) + Homesickness + Boring Work Environment + less than stellar self image = One Sad Beatrice

And there you have it.

Tomorrow is my Birthday. I have a real love/hate relationship with my Birthday, I always have. A large part of me would really just like it to be passed over; unacknowledged by all. Of course, the part of me who likes presents and gifts would never allow this to happen so in that respect, I suppose the day must be recognized on some level.

Sigh. I'm sure all will be well enough soon as there is no fundamental reason for the gloominess. At any rate, the Birthday will be over and done with tomorrow which, as noted in the above formula, seems to be playing a fairly substantial role in this oh so dismal day. Besides, there is always the party in Super Loft to look forward to this weekend.

Later Friends,


Lessons in Love.

Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
By Beatrice Petty

So, it would appear that my good friend Cascadia has decided to immerse herself in the crazy little subculture that is Lavalife. I for one say "Good for You" Cascadia. And despite having removed myself from the insanity a short while ago... I am very excited for the adventure on which she is about to emabark. With that in mind, I would like to offer the Fair Cascadia a little bit of advice in the lava/love department. Here goes...

1) Don't waste your time doing the msn flirting. Get the meeting out of the way as quickly as possible. I CANNOT tell you how much time I wasted chatting the evening away only to be horribly disappointed when I finally met the chap in person. No matter how "MFEO" you are on msn or how much "chat" chemistry you have, you will never know for sure until you meet face to face. That's all I have to say about that.

3) Don't meet up with any expectations. Expectations suck. I have devised the following equation to help things make more sense of things: hours and hours of MSN chatting + great msn chemistry(x msn sex) + laughs = RAISED EXPECTATIONS

2) Find out what the guy wants before you meet him. If you are in this whole thing to find someone who is open to a long-term committed relationship, then you really should be aware that the guy you are about to meet is only open to bringing you over to his buddy's place where you can have a good old fashionned gang bang in the hot tub. Right away we've got a problem here folks. It is also good to know if the guy you are seeing is still completely in love with his ex-girlfriend thus dooming the whole thing from the very beginning, but that little nugget of information won't come out until after you've met... and fallen in like... just be prepared.

3) Further to the point about RAISED EXPECTATIONS (see above formula), DO NOT meet up with any expectations AT ALL: (RAISED EXPECTATIONS x Guy a complete dolt) + could have been home watching favorite TV program = SEVERE AND HORRIBLE DISAPPOINTMENT.

4) Block, block, block. Cascadia, I doubt you will understand the ins and outs of LL already, but this is very important. When you go out with somebody... whether you end up liking them, or not liking them... BLOCK THEM. Case in point... I have this friend who relentlessley tortured herself by going online specifically to "catch" her lavaboys in the act of being online after a date... and then getting mad at them... which in turn made them run away screaming. You will have to accept the fact that, amazing date or no, a guy (and you) is going to go right back on the next day to check his lavalife. For reasons that I will explain in a bit... just block the bastard and save yourself a lot of grief.

5) Don't waste your time with guys who are too busy to meet up. It's bullshit. And if you get that excuse after you've met... Forget about him... he's not into you. Move on to the next guy who is.

6) Never assume that a guy you have gone out with a few times has taken himself off lavalife. I dated someone for 2 months and he never took himself off. That should have been a very big hint to me that he wasn't into me. Only you know how long you should let it go on before you say anything. In my opinion, this is one of the worst aspects of Lavalife... the never knowing how many people the other person is seeing besides you. It will make you crazy, but unless otherwise stated, assume that the other person is still seeing other people. If it bothers you then say something. I waited too long and in the end it bit me in the ass.

7) Don't let a guy get away with ANY bad behavior! If he doesn't phone when he says he is going to, or consistantly breaks plans or, in general, isn't making an effort to see you... Kick him to the curb. Again, don't make excuses for his behaviour... If you find yourself saying "He's just really independant" or "His job keeps him really busy" to justify him not calling or getting together... Hmmmm well, speaking from experience... NOT GOOD!

8) I've rambled... to be sure... but this is the last piece of advice I will give today on this matter and believe me, I could go on and on and on and on and...

Understand that A LOT of people are on lava to find the "perfect person". My experience has led me to believe that these people have no idea what exactly the perfect person will look like, but that's what they are looking for nonetheless. That, coupled with the fact that to meet that so called "perfect match" might just be a login away means that A LOT of people will just move onto the next in line-- always hoping to find something better-- without really giving something that could be good a fair chance. Here we have a case of a bird in the hand NOT being worth 2 in the bush. I guess what I am trying to say is try not to take it too personally when a guy who you thought you had great chemistry with doesn't want to meet up again. You were not the girl he fantasized he would meet online and he has decided that the 2 in the bush might be. Little does he know that the joke is on him and the next girl he goes out with will be doing the same thing to him. Everyone gets their comeupance in the end. It just sucks when it has to come at your expense.

Anyway, there you have it, a little bit of advice from someone who had to learn about things the hard way. I hope it helps. I look forward to reading about your adventures on your blog. How fitting that this posting was written on the day "The Man" has decided we can officially celebrate LOVE. I should be bitter at once again being single on this day... every year without fail... It's mind boggling really...

But I am hopeful that there is someone out there for me. So while I sit here, too chicken to ask my mailman out for a beer... I just hope it will be soon... I'm getting bored over here Universe!!!


Entirely too much time on my hands at work!

And now it's time for a new feature on the best darn blog in the entire Blogiverse. Introducing...

Who is More Unfortunate?


a) Paul Martin
b) Kim Jong Il

Personally I'm leaning towards A. You don't see P.M. wearing such cool sunglasses. I'm practically swooning.


A Very "Special" Person...

"Special" Person
Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
That's our Prime Minister in a nut shell. I know, I've already posted today, but I feel compelled to make some observations on the Gomery Inquiry that is happening (and is on the TV behind me) as I type.

Yesterday had the former PM testifying. Goodness knows I am no fan of Chretien, but man o'man... He's one fiesty old dude. Without going into the details, which are by now old news... He held his own under the pressure and somehow-- and I am not saying this is necessarily a good thing-- somehow he managed to make everyone feel quilty for ever having suspected him of any wrong doing.

But that was yesterday and this is today (most profound statement ever!!!)

Today we've got good old Pauly. Now, with the exception of the great delight I take in seeing just how unphotgenic our PM is, I am really no fan of the fella. He is so arrogant... I think he truly believes that his "you know what" doesn't stink.

But it does Paul!!! It does stink. In fact, you are so full of "you know what" right now on TV that I can smell you from here. Your coughing and stuttering isn't fooling anyone. And neither is changing the subject and pleading innocence. How is it possible that he remembers nothing from the entire period? This is the person running our country? Does this crack monkey even know what he did yesterday? One can only hope that Gomery gets off his ass and bitch slaps some sense into him very soon!

This rant was brought to you by Lakota Topical Pain Reliever.

Petty Out

Signs, Signs...

Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
Everywhere there's signs. So, back to My Mailman... No juicy news on that front yet, but rest assured... I hope to at least be able to give y'all a little something. I have decided that sometime, very soon, I will take the bold step and ask him out for a beer.

"HOW BOLD, DARING EVEN!!!" you must all be saying to yourselves. And you'd be right... That was until I began to notice that the Universe was trying to tell me something that I couldn't not listen to... in the guise of a TV ad. OK, so maybe I am crazy... well, I am, but that's not the point of the excercise.

Anyway, these past few weeks has seen me turn into very much a homebody. As such, I have been watching a fair amount of TV, which sucks because-- with the exception of Alias (which I have missed to weeks in a row... don't get me started)-- there really is nothing good on. Anyway, 2 things on the tele have stood out in my mind of late. The first is that damn Lakota commercial that seems to play every 5 minutes. I just completed a survey that should have me receiving a free sample of the pain reliever any time now. I'm very excited about it as you can tell.

The second commercial of note is a little more relevant and it is of course a Canada Post commercial. It too seems to be playing every five minutes. You can't miss it... A happy little restaurant owner, working in conjunction with her equally happy mailman, all set to the happy little tune of "All Right Now". I think it is atttempting to get across the message that "If you use Canada Post to help set up your new business, it will be successful and everyone will be so happy and there will be peace on earth". Or somthing like that.

Obviously to me, the message is quite different, otherwise I wouldn't have gone to the effort of writing about some stupid TV commercials, no matter how informative they might be. No peeps, my view is that it CANNOT be a coincidence that Canada Post commercials have started popping up at this particular time. When was the last time you saw any Canada Post commercial, honestly? And now, here they are, running every 5 minutes. You can call me crazy if that will make YOU feel better. In the meantime, I will quietly sit here, gathering up the courage to ask out My Mailman, just like the TV told me to.



Fun with Metaphors!

Love Life
Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
And so, to sponge off of the ideas of The Roomie, who had originally sponged off the subconcious of Yours Truly... The attached image would seem to represent my love life at the present... or at least my perception of it. I must warn you, that despite the gratuitous shot of meat, the contents contained in this entry are a little more philisophical than what you have normally come to expect from Bea.

But before I delve into the psychology behind this revelation, an update on the Stalker is in order I think. So, it would seem that Ash is "leaving the country" next month. Why? I have no idea. Where to? Again, no clue. Do I care? Well so far as that I care that he will be out of the country and no longer down the street stalking me. He really, really, really wants to see me "one last time" before he leaves. The thought occured to me that maybe I should give him the benefit of the doubt and grab a beer with him as per his request... But then that thought made me sick to my stomach. What could we possibly talk about?

"Ash, it was really great knowing you... Thanks so much for stalking me. It was really appreciated and made me feel very special and loved. Keep up the good work"

Cuckoo. Anyway, that's the update on that front... now back to the meat.

So, I had this dream last night. In essence, it had me coveting 2 slabs of juicy steak, of which I had taken the extra effort of picking out so that they would be just right. I was so excited to eat these steaks... on a side note... I must have been really hungry (or horny, which will make sense shortly). Anyway, I was so excited. I put the first steak down, and as I turned to get the other steak to put on the Barbi... THE HORROR... my first, perfect steak was gone. I was so upset... I yelled at the redneck chickie who was attending to the BBQ, but in her opinion, a steak was a steak was a steak and I should just get over it and pick another one. And then I woke up.

In many ways, this dream represents the TITANIC growth my emotional self has taken over the past few months, specifically with regards to relationships/boys and how I view them. Without going into too much detail, I used to confuse "I really like you, let's be together forever and ever" with "I get along with you, and I have no other prospects at this time, so we might as well date". I also confused "I like you Bea, but you are not 100% what I am looking for, nothing personal you understand, so let's call it a day before you get really hurt" with "You are digusting and no one in their right mind would ever want to be with you".

Sorry to have been so blunt, but there you have it. Anyhoo, what I am trying to say is that since I first began the Lavaffair, I have now done a complete 180. I am no longer willing to settle for "I think you are so-so... let's be together forever" because, I know now that I actually deserve "You are the only person I could see myself spending the rest of my life with"... and that's just fine with me thank you very much.

So, back to the meat... Since the loss of the PNB, whom I must give some credit for the exponential period of growth I have experience over these past few weeks, my concious mind (and heart) has embraced the fact that there are so many other fish in the sea. It was only a matter of time before my subconcious joined the party. Of course, I hate fish so my dream self would never actually allow me to dream about said seafood, so instead it chose some nice juicy steaks to represent the metaphor-- and in my humble opinion, even more appropriate considering the subject. Get it? Meat representing men? I told you there would be a sexual aspect to the whole thing!

So, while there is still a part of me who has some growing to do... hence why I was so upset at the loss of what I considered to be a "perfectly chosen" steak... The trailer trash BBQ lady really had it right when she told me to get over it and pick another steak already. Thank you Trailer Trash Lady!



Drum Roll Please...

Me on Bloor
Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
The Mailman's name is Peter. He is very adorable. Did I already mention that? I must say that the little flutter I got in the pit of my stomach was more than a little welcome after the crappy morning I had had up until then. Stupid 168 Slumington bus... Here are some observations from this morning that I wish to share with y'all:
1) I don't like talking in the morning. I'm not a morning person people. Accept it.
2) I don't like the smell of Garlic first thing in the morning. It makes me want to throw up.
3) I don't like talking to strange men at bus stops. Why? Well, after the whole Ash affair... Also, see observation #1.

I give kudos to the bus driver though... he was getting everyone onto that bus come hell or high water. And he said "Thank You... Have a nice day!" Favorite bus driver ever! But man... if there was ever a day for some CSBF to make one feel better...

Speaking of CSBF... an interesting weekend on that front. I have a new friend, hitherto to be called the NF. Anyway, hanging out with the NF... it was all good. Very nice, very comfortable... two friends sharing some laughs, and some wine. Anyway, throughout the evening, the concept of CSBFs came up... but, being a complete metard at times, I kind of wasn't picking up what was being putting down. And seeing as how it was never directed at me specifically... I was sort of confused. It wasn't until the next day that I thought to myself "Hmmm... did that actually happen?" But again, still not 100% sure.

And would I? I never have before... so what are the rules? I mean, do I get to participate in the decision making process? What if I decide that I want some nookie? Can I call up and say "hey, let's get together"? Take today for example... I had a rough morning... I'm feeling a little randy... I could do with a little bit o' pleasure this evening... Or is it strictly up to the guy to decide when it is convenient for him? And what of any semblance of actual friendship? Once you embark on this adventure, is it then possible to really, truly remain friends? Or will the assumption always be there that any sort of friendly get-togethers will always lead to sex? And what happens when either person starts seeing someone else? Can you then go back to being "just friends"? It's very confusing... But at the same time it is all very exciting...

Anyway, I welcome any thoughts, comments, advice etc... on this matter. Like I said, it's a new one for me... and one that I am not entirely convinced I didn't make up in my head... I was Petty after all this weekend. Maybe I never left the loft... sigh...Only time will tell I suppose.



Me... Feb 4/05

Mailman Came...

Mailman went, his name still unknown. I'm such a chicken. And this is true on so many levels I am discovering... The stalker called last night... I'm afraid to talk to him. Why? Because I hate confrontation... especially confrontations with crazy people. The roomie says that I am going to have to physically tell him to fuck off as he isn't going to get it otherwise. I know she's right but for now, I am going to live in the little fantasy world I have created... the one where he'll will actually interpret the fact that the reason I am not returning his phone calls/ didn't want to go out for dinner or drinks/plainly stated on several occasions that I don't want to date him is that I well... I think you get the picture. I am open to any other options as long as they don't involve me having to actually talk/see him in any way. I could take out an ad on a bus I suppose...

Stalker Ad

Anyway... we'll see. I think I've got it figured out though... You see, it just so happens that while Ash was in Amsterdam... "I got back together with the guy I was dating" *wink, wink*... I didn't, of course... but he doesn't need to know that. After careful consideration I think that it's the only way out... Sorry Jeff... don't mean to drag you into this whole sordid affair... but, well... you may as well be good for something at this point.

And in other matters that do not pertain to me per say... Today I am stupid tired. Why? Because I am the nicest person in the entire world. I hope the roomie remembers that, dishes or no dishes this morning, I sacrificed a good night's sleep and endured the excrutiating agony of being the 5th wheel... all in the name of her lovelife. So, while I will be spending the weekend alone... once again... sigh... she'll be out gallivanting with a new PNB. Poor Beatrice, but Yay Molly!!!


So Bored...

Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
Is it me, or was my blog much more interesting when I had the PNB to whine about? Admittedly, the stalker did lend some drama for a few days, but since he has been in Amsterdam, there has been a decided lack of action on that front... Not that I am complaining mind you.

Well, it may interest you to know that I have an new PNC (potential new crush)... on The Mailman. That's right, you heard me! He pops by the COC everyday to deliver the mail, always with a smile on his face. And he's VERY tall, which I have now come to the conclusion is a VERY important factor when forming any sort of romantic attraction. Anyway, he is very tall, very nice, very adorable and, I have come close on several occasions over these past few weeks of taking the bold step of asking his name. I figured it was the most logical first step to starting any relationship... unless...

You meet a guy in a bar when you are really, really wasted and you spend the whole night making out with him, and you give him your number, and when he calls you have no idea who he is or what he is talking about... body shots... whatever... so you phone your best friend to see if this guy is full of shit only to discover that you were indeed guilty of participating in said tequila body shots, and playing tonsil hockey with the above mentionned unknown fella all night on the dance floor... Good Times...

Anyway, I think I've about got the nerve up to ask, but... and I think this is the Universe having yet ANOTHER laugh at my expense... this past week there has ALWAYS been someone around when he shows up... Thanks Universe.

Stay Tuned,

PS... Maybe I should mention that the picture attatched to this entry is not my Mailman. I'm not that desperate... yet.


Seriously Displeased!

Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
Stupid George Bush and his stupid State of the Union address... pre-empting Alias. I watch one program... ONE PROGRAM... all week... Why I oughtta...

John Kerry would have never made HIS State of the Union address on a Wednesday. Nope, he would have done it on Friday or something. There is NEVER anything good on TV on Friday. And it's not like we don't KNOW what state the union is in. It is very plainly and stupidly obvious... the union is not in a good place right now... and I DON'T think that Alias needed to have been pre-empted JUST to tell us something that we already know. Hmph!

Thank you for your time,
Beatrice (missing her favorite program) Petty


ffftf ftttf ffffftt!

The Wiez
Originally uploaded by Beatrice Petty.
First off, let me say a big Happy Birthday to Pauly Shore!!!

You may be asking yourselves... can Bea have picked a more random celebrity to acknowledge today? I mean, there are loads of other celeb birthdays today... celebs whom I am a much bigger fan of... Terry Jones of Monty Python for example... I love that guy... Lisa Marie Presley??? Boris Yeltsin??? OK, so maybe Pauly isn't all that random...

Anyway, it may seem odd that Pauly Shore is even on the brain...But it isn't, not really. Last night the Roomie and I rented "Pauly Shore is Dead", the newest offering from said comedian. The review? If you are Pauly's biggest fan you will certainly, probably, most likely enjoy it somewhat. Even if you are not the biggest fan ever, you'll probably get a few chuckles... My take on the whole "mockumentary" however, is that one should be in a slightly altered state of mind while watching. In other words... It's a "baker" folks, plain and simple. If you like this style of movie, I suggest sticking with those put out by Christopher Guest... whose birthday, oddly enough, is in 4 days time... Spinal Tap, Waiting for Guffmann, Best in Show, A Mighty Wind... all very funny... Sorry Pauly. Thanks for coming out though!

On the stalker front... no real news... He did phone me from Amsterdam last night which was a little frightening. Thank goodness Pauly was there to take my mind off things.

Oh, and to the person who left that crazy rant on yesterday's posting... In answer to your question... Chocolate gives me a headache, but I won't say no to Kahlua. Should you wish to send a Valentine's Day gift... or a birthday one for that matter, please contact me directly for details on where best to send said gift(s). Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.