What if...

Jackie Chan and Richard Simmons had a child? Now, what if Jackie Chan and Richard Simmons were cats? I mean, besides the obvious that they themselves could probably not have a child, no matter what species they were due to gender incompatibility... but if you add in the premise behind that movie where Arnold Schwarzenegger got pregnant... man what was Emma Thompson thinking??? Anyway, so assuming that a) Jackie Chan and Richard Simmons could magically transform into cats and that b) one of them (I see it being Richard Simmons) got pregnant and that c) I might possibly have too much time on my hands THEN...

I imagine that their offspring would be not unlike Hugh. I write this as he is hanging from a painting we have propped up against one of the walls. It's his new favorite thing to do, besides flying through the air out of no where and slicing a chunk out of my hand like a psychotic ninja. I would stop him because art deserves better than to be clawed by an insane kitten, but the painting came from our insane neighbour from down the hall AND it's pretty much the most hideous thing I have ever seen, hence why we have never put it up on the wall in the year or so we have had it. Don't get me wrong, I don't dislike all modern art, but there should at least be some sort of meaning behind your painting. When said artist admits that his paintings are meaningless squiggles, lines and spray paint... "What do the squiggles mean?" "Mean? They don't mean anything, they are just squiggles." "Um, do you have any dogs playing poker?"

And now he's curled up and sleeping... not 2 minutes after he tore through the loft like Richard Simmons on speed.

So adorable.

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