Why is a Beer When it Spins???

Another birthday come and gone, though the fact that I can out drink a couple of alcoholic Englishmen is slightly disconcerting to me. And by slightly, of course, I mean yikes.

But here’s something curious… despite drinking my weight, and then some, in booze, I came home and just wasn’t quite ready to go to sleep. So up I stayed and watched some videos until 5am or so until I finally decided to hit the hay. When I woke up again to go potty, as I do pretty much every night because I have the worst bladder ever…

On a related albeit disgusting note, I feel that I need to share that I almost peed my bed the other week… I was having one of those dreams where you are going to the bathroom… and I REALLY had to go… so I finally found a bathroom though as usual, it offered little in the way of privacy… Why is it that the dreaming me who needs to go to the bathroom must always do so in a communal toilet, or one with a stall whose door is missing/ too short/ toilet backed up etc… But nature called and so I went and it was so relieving (no pun intended). Thankfully I am a light sleeper because I woke up just in the nick of time and disaster was averted. Can you remember the last time you peed a bed? I do. I was in university and it was my ex-boyfriend’s bed. I swear that I didn’t do it on purpose… just one of those things. I never did tell him.

Anyhoo… the rest of that story seems so stupid now that I went off on the pee pee tirade, so I will just end it by saying that I woke up early, like 8am early… and despite having had an entire keg of beer to myself, not to mention who knows how many shooters, I was wide awake and raring to go.

Cut to… Last night. After a very pleasant interview experience which I really, really hope I got, I was joined in my hood by the taller of the beer loving Brits who, I will admit that despite agreeing to be strictly platonic friends, I have a bit of a crush on. It’s quite manageable for the time being but we’ll see… so with that in mind, you may be interested to know that last night, he finally declared his love…

For my cat. I could be making way too much out of the whole thing but I am thinking that when the guy you have the teensiest crush on begins a sentence with “I love”, only to follow with “your cat”… It ain’t looking good in ye olde love department, unless you’re the cat.

So there we were having some pints. I only had three over the course of 4 hours. But despite that, I got drunk… had a somewhat early night, lots of water… 7 or so hours of sleep. And today? Well in no particular order…

1) Could NOT get out of bed this morning. No headache mind you, just could have slept several more hours, like, several.
2) My cat attacked me without warning from behind the curtains. Am thinking that if a certain tall Englishman loves the damn thing so much then he can have him!
3) I’m as bloated as… well, as something that’s really bloated. Am open to suggestions.
4) Our finance guy greeted me today with “Hi Bea. You look REALLY tired”.
5) Gas. Gassy. I have gas. I should be put in a quarantined room (with an open window please) so as not to offend anymore people.
6) 3 + 4 + 5 = :(

I guess what I am trying to say is…


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