Daily Rant

Here’s my little beef du jour…

Why is it that people insist in putting butter on sandwiches and/or wraps? It makes no sense. You can’t taste it to speak of, but you can always feel the layer of mushy pastiness amidst the other foodstuff contained within the sandwich and/or wrap. So I am trying to figure out the rationale behind adding this extra ingredient when it serves no purpose whatsoever except to mess up a perfectly good sammy.

Don’t get me wrong, I am a lover of all things butter… no Becel on my popcorn for me thanks… and there is nothing better than smothering a freshly baked piece of bread with the creamy goodness that is butter… salted of course, because there is nothing more useless than unsalted butter. You might was well just smother your food in lard, which, while very important in the pie crust baking process, is kind of icky when you think of it.

I had an experience recently with duck fat. Was over at a friends place… who I see frequently so perhaps he needs a BP moniker… TBD as required. Anyway, went over for dinner… loverly dinner it was and on the menu was Yorkshire pudding… which I love to death. Well apparently the proper English way of making it is with globs of duck fat which, to a person who likes neither duck or heaps of animal fat, I was slightly disconcerted over. But as I was the guest and he was so generously cooking this fabulous meal, I kept my mouth shut. While waiting for the YPs to bake, the thought did occur to me to flee the scene so I wouldn’t have to deal with the duck fat however, I decided that would probably be rude. After all, it was I who pretty much insisted that he cook the darn things in the first place so I decided to suck it up and just deal with it… fully aware that I am the pickiest and worst guest since the earliest cavemen began inviting friends over to their caves for some roasted wooly mammoth. I’d be the cave wench asking if there was anything else to eat besides the mammoth… or if there was gravy. Because I have to imagine that mammoth is really gamey and someone like me, cavewoman or no, would absolutely need a nice rich gravy to tone down the mammothy goodness. Anyway, my point was that in the end I ate it, but part of me questioned why I was eating a pool of duck fat with every bite. To end this bit of my rant…

To the person who cooked that dinner and who may possibly read this at some point… The dinner was amazingly DELISH and it is my problem, not yours that I am such a freak when it comes to food. I could go into the deets of how I used the former-PNB as a lab monkey when tasting food at the Wine and Cheese Show yesterday, but I won’t.

In conclusion, butter on sandwiches and/or wraps suck!

Thank you for your time.