Wednesday

Crushing



Interpretation is a funny thing. I learned this yesterday after a discussion with Girl regarding my talk about having "crushes" on certain people... whether it be random men on the bus or my former-PNB or countless numbers of astronomers at the observatory I used to work at, or the vet etc... We debated on what exactly a "crush" entails and I learned, that it can mean different things to different people.

For me, a crush is a small little thing, a passing infatuation if you will, that I have no intention of ever acting upon. Am I going to jump Dr. Doolittle's bones when I see him next? No. If I knew for sure sure what his marital status was (and if he wasn't like 50), would I try and take things to them next level? Again, no. For me, a crush is a way of admiring someone from a far. It usually goes away quite quickly, an "out of sight, out of mind" kind of thing.

However, that is not to say that a crush can never turn into a serious "liking". If the "crush" seemingly becomes mutual and depending on the nature of the crush and both parties are open to more, then a crush can definitely turn into something bigger.

There are also varying degrees of "crushing". Back in university (if Wee is reading this, she can attest), I had HUGE crushes on a few different boys. I would assign them nicknames based on the various clothing they wore. I will never forget "hat guy" or "vest guy" (I was somewhat less creative back then than I am now)... I admired them from afar and I admired them often. These crushes usually ended when I met said "*insert random clothing here* guys". "Vest guy" I remember in particular because we ended up being quite friendly with each other after I finally did get the nerve to talk to him (I'm sure I was in a bar... ah, liquid courage, my old friend). But my "crush" turned from butterflies when I would catch a glimpse of him to "meh" after we did meet. The crush was much, much more exciting.

So, I can admire my random men on the bus every day. I can get excited about hanging with the former-PNB. I can look forward to taking my cat to the vet. I can have all these crushes (and more to be sure) without them being any more than a passing, informal fancy. Can a crush turn into something more substantial? Yes, it can, but then it would no longer be a crush. It would then be a "liking that was until fairly recently a crush" which, with any luck, might turn into "a crush that has long since been a liking, and is on the way to becoming a love interest" etc etc...

You get the picture.

Hello, my name is Beatrice Petty and I am a crushaholic.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Haha - vest guy/hat guy/roots man/rd from hell.... there were oh so many! I had just one "true love/crush" back then.... the one we called CAM. He called me twitch - it was a deep connection.

Beatrice Petty said...

lmao... I forgot about my Roots Man... I went out on a date with him. He was an idiot. Further prof that a crush can be more fun than the real thing... hahaha... twitch.

mollyblogger said...

Dude, I crush all the time. It never amounts to anything because that's not the point of a crush. The point of a crush is that it stays in the realm of the intangible, the abstract. That's why they're in a way better than liking someone... because there's no real emotional investment there.

I have several men right now who make my knees buckle but if they asked me to sleep with them... I'd probably recoil in horror. Go figure.

highcontrast said...

there's nothing better than when a crush turns into more than a crush. those are the best ones.
btw, the old man in this picture creeps me out....

Veruca Salt said...

Hi, my name's Cate and I'm a crushaholic, too - and it takes pretty much NOTHING for me to develop a crush - my current infatuation is this darling little boy (he's 20) who works at my work (but not in my office) when I see him, I get all giggly and hair-toss-y and lip-gloss-application-y - but I'm over it the second he leaves the building